Are you aware of the worrying divorce statistics? Do you remember the day you got married and if you want to resurrect that happiness then here are some strategies for saving a marriage. If you are intent on avoiding the divorce courts,are there any ways to start to save a marriage?
3 Tips to Start You Thinking.
1 Break the pattern.
Ever connect feelings with sounds or smells? You know the feel good factor of new mown grass, or the smell of coffee does it for me and you will have similar experiences. What about the bad feelings? We unconsciously connect feelings to to sounds,smells and sights. When we first get together, we dont associate anything but as time moves on we begin to connect those sights sounds and smells, good and bad.
When things are fine, these associations can keep us attracted through the good and the bad. When a marriage starts to fail, bad associations overtake the good and we begin to link bad feelings to the physical and mental features of our partner.Whilst there might still be some good, overall the balance has tipped to negative. These patterns need to be broken.
If you think about it hard enough you will come up with lots of ways of looking, sounding and smelling different. If you keep doing what you always did, you will have what you always had, right? Make some changes and start afresh.
2 Break for a While
If done correctly, taking a break can help in saving a marriage. It can sound a little over the top and possibly dangerous but the occasional time apart can work wonders. You dont have to feel that this is the end, you just need to think of a reason why you are going to be away and out of it for a while.When saving a marriage, you need to find the time and space to work on a strategy and clamp down on worrying thoughts. You must have heard the saying “absence makes the heart grow fonder” Well it can. Absence allows us to appreciate the good things and missing something or someone can lead us to appreciate how valuable it is.
Contact them occasionally and if it feels right tell them you love them. You now have the opportunity to miss the other and perhaps begin to see each other differently.
3 Exterminate The Negatives
Do you know what the damaging things are in your marriage? You cannot let rage tear your marraige apart. Find out why you are both feeling like this. Dont just fire in and shout things you dont really mean because of the situation. Avoid talking until matters have quietened down a bit, but don’t brood on it. You both need to work on what is becoming a negative, remember why you first fell in love and work on recapturing those feelings and emotions.
To have any chance of saving a marriage that is falling down a well, you have to stand back from it, take help and look at what others have found to make dramatic improvements. Make a start here!